"Mom, I'm pregnant"
These are not the words a mom with a teenage daughter wants to hear.
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In a country where the right to make our own reproductive decisions is entrenched within the constitution, one might think that abortion debate is better left for private dinner conversations and not open media debate… which is a sure way to get many all hot and bothered about something which isn’t going to change.
But given the results of the Female Nation Survey 2007 released last week, I find myself compelled to ask our readership to consider certain statistics. When SA women were asked what they thought of abortion, this is what they had to say.
–among those with one child 22% feel this way,
–among those with two children, 15%;
–among those with three children, only 6% feel abortion should never be permitted under any circumstances.
We asked the Bettina Wyngaard, Director of the Women's Legal Centre in Cape Town, to comment.
"I'm quite surprised at the outcome of the survey," said Wyngaard, "especially in light of the fact that one of the organisations we work with has reported performing 123 414 terminations of pregnancy since legalisation in 1997. That is just one organisation, and they have reported steady increases in request every year.
"Certainly the outcome of the survey does not appear to be in line with the practical experience at the clinics dealing with termination of pregnancies," she added.
"I can only deduce that women may be practicing termination of pregnancy, but are for some reason unwilling to endorse the practice."
This deduction sounds fair when you consider that some 38% of urban SA women have had unplanned pregnancy although a fifth of those women do not have children… which means a lot of pregnancies are being terminated.
Where do you stand on the abortion issue? Do you feel that women should be able to make their own reproductive choices or do you think that all termination is murder, even in the case of abuse or ill health?
And do you feel it appropriate to have a say in another's decisions in this arena?
And – more interesting I think for our purposes – how do you support a friend experiencing an unwanted pregnancy? Have you had to deal with your own?
Please share your comments and experiences below... and please be as candid as possible.
The Female Nation survey was designed, analysed and weighted by external quantitative researchers. The sample group of around 7 500 responses has been weighted (by age, race and income) to represent urban, SA women earning over R3 000, as per the SA Labour Force Survey of 2006; i.e.: some 2 million SA women.
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| My view is quite simple. As long as a woman is deemed unfit to make decisions regarding her own body and life - who she can marry, who can have sex with her, and what happens afterwards, we will loose sight of 50% of the people the constituent was set up to protect. I personally have no right to force my views and beliefs onto any other person. I can canvas for understanding, for women to make an informed decision, but at the end, it is not my body and not my decision - especially since I won't be the one that has to live with the consequences. | ||
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| Lize on 27.03.2007 at 10:22 |
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| I am one of those people who will probably never have an abortion. But that doesn't mean I have any right to decide for someone else, what they should or shouldn't do. I don't accept people telling me what to do in any other area of my life, why would I let anyone force me to do what they want in this most intensely personal area? I have been raped, and should I have fallen pregnant then, I would likely have had an abortion, purely because of the viciousness of the attack. I have also supported a friend through an abortion, something she felt was necessary to stop her life from falling apart. You know what? She's my friend, and her having an abortion means nothing to me, it doesn't affect me in any way. My only job was to support her, to get her there and home, to hold her hand and reassure her that she is still a wonderful person. It was not to tell her that she's "a horrible person who deserves everything that's coming to her", as some of our friends have mentioned about the act of abortion - not knowing how they are hurting one of the women they look up to the most. Basically, if it's not you in trouble, having been raped, abused, or just having had a condom burst - after all, what is a condom for if not to prevent pregnancy and diseases - then: shut up. It's not your body, it's not your life, and you have no right to tell anyone else what to do. | ||
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| Susie on 27.03.2007 at 10:31 |
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| I feel that having an abortion is a personal and confidential decision no matter what the circumstances. We all live our own lives in our own way and personally such a decision should be made only by the partners involved. It should not affect the public...PERIOD! This subject is not a soapie, its a life changing decision and the public should rather worry about there own homes and family than others. | ||
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| JADE on 27.03.2007 at 10:34 |
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| Except in the case of rape, there is no such thing as an unwanted pregnancy. If the person did not want to fall pregnant they should have made sure they had contraception, or should not not have had sex at all. These days there is no excuse for ignorance. Girls are using abortion as a means of birth control and that is WRONG. What about women who desperately want to have children but are unable? Instead of getting rid of your careless and self inflicted 'inconvenience', why not give the baby up for adoption to someone who would appreciate it and who deserves it more than you anyway? | ||
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| Amanda on 27.03.2007 at 10:36 |
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| With my first pregnancy there was a risk of downs syndrome. We were adamant we would have the baby. Fortunately the fears were groundless. We are planning a second child but with the same concern. Now, I'm not sure if I would be able to deal with/handle a downs baby/child. Will I make the same decision again? Only time will tell. Because inside I don't even known. My morals and feelings are debating this matter every waking moment.... | ||
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| Options on 27.03.2007 at 11:03 |
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| My views on abortion have changed from when I was 16, to now, 24. I was always pro abortion, but I now feel that I will never ever get an abortion, except if I was raped, or severe medical conditions on both sides. I kind of feel that if a 16 year old gets pregnant, due to consensual sex, the least she can do is give the baby up for adoption? But that's just my opinion. I still feel that it is not my place to make decisions for others, it should be their choice. | ||
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| Tanya on 27.03.2007 at 11:06 |
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| Amanda, I agree whole heartedly. | ||
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| Tanya on 27.03.2007 at 11:11 |
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| It's easy to judge of someone that is young and careless. It's also easy to judge someone that just, doesn't know. It's easy to judge someone that has a health problem. I feel it's every women's RIGHT to choose. Whether they are careless, ignorant, abused or ill. Have you ever seen the tears of a new mother giving her baby away for adoption because there is no other choice? And the endless regrets because realisation comes too late and the reality of "I DID have a choice" hits them. It's a personal choice, whether the rate of abortions have gone up or not, it REMAINS a personal choice, we should be grateful we HAVE that choice. | ||
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| Isabel on 27.03.2007 at 11:18 |
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| no one has the right to dictate to any woman/girl about abortion. and to say just have the baby and give it up for adoption is short-sighted. All those moralistic people who are anti-abortion - what are you doing re the millions of children who are abused, sexually, physically & mentally - why don't we see you in the front line holding up banners with murderous looks on your faces screaming for the heads of the perpetrators. don't judge unless you have been there... | ||
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| Linky on 27.03.2007 at 11:33 |
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| The survey can of course not be said to be very broad - it completely excludes rural areas and the poor - exactly those women who most often simply do not have a lot of options open to them, - regardless of what was written in the constitution. It should also be remembered that the constitution does not, at any given time, represent the opinion, wishes or feelings of the majority of South Africans simply because the ruling party enjoys an overwhelming majority support in the country. Something that has always astonished me in rural areas is that people would see an abortion as a total taboo, not even a possibility to consider but yet find it possible lo leave a newborn baby in a field / toilet to die. I think it can also be seen from the survey that where emotions get involved (people who could never have their own children or who lost children etc) the logic is just not the same anymore. I suspect it is the same for desolate women faced with post-natal depression. | ||
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| Anelia on 27.03.2007 at 11:37 |
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