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11 April 2006
The gift of confidence
One of the greatest gifts you can give your daughter is self-confidence and the ability to make independent, responsible choices.
Here are some pointers on how to help your daughter (and yourself) have a healthy body image.
Take your genes into account. A St Bernard is never going to be a greyhound, even if it starves itself. If you hate the large hips you inherited from your mother, find a way to accept and respect them.
Make health the focus, rather than appearance.
Don’t give your daughter the message that her life's limited because of her looks. People can be happy and respected, no matter what their body size or shape.
Demonstrate an appreciation of your own body, with all its imperfections and limitations. Take care of yourself and teach your daughter to do the same.
Be alert to cultural standards of thinness. Let your daughter know that the pictures she sees of models and film stars aren't realistic, and to never compare her body with these images.
Be prepared to cushion and debate any mean remarks from family members, teachers, friends or sports coaches about your child's body or weight.
Never give your child a message that your love for her is conditional upon her having a particular body shape or size, or that fat people deserve to be mocked and ridiculed.
Never ridicule a child who asks to be reassured on how she looks. Take her seriously. If she looks fine, tell her so plainly – many times, if necessary. If she doesn't look good, tactfully suggest some improvements. For instance: "I like the way you've done your hair, but I was wondering whether people will only notice your nose-ring, and not your pretty pony-tail."
Don't lie to your child about her looks: she'll quickly detect your insincerity and you'll lose your credibility.
Previously published in True Love, Subscribe now and save
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Article: from True Love
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