Should you shack up?

It didn't take long for me to realise that living with my girlfriend might require a slight adjustment period – we were still packing my stuff for the move to her place. I was lugging another heavy box through the kitchen on my way downstairs to the van, sweat streaming from my face, when Kirsten looked up from the cutting board she was carefully wrapping in newspaper.

"Oooh!" she sighed, spotting a snow globe we picked up during our first holiday together. "Remember where we bought this?"

I'm dying, she's dawdling. Maybe, just maybe, I started to think, Kirsten and I are not a single soul split betwixt two bodies. Shacking up is a good way to save on rent and get lovin' without scheduling an appointment. But there's more to moving in than sex and money.

Come to grips with these seven revelations before you move in and maybe the relationship will outlast the lease.

1. Your relationship will change
"Cohabitation," says Miller, "is a lot like turning the TV to your favourite channel – and then leaving it on 24/7. You're bound to see some stuff you don't like so much."

For one thing, your beloved won't always look as hot as she used to when you picked her up on a Saturday night. Yes, that gorgeous lady is still in there somewhere, but now you'll have to get acquainted with the stinky chick who just came home from the gym and the testy woman who's too preoccupied with the credit card bill to succumb to your frisky antics. Know this and accept it before going in.

2. Your sex life will definitely change, big-time
Not every night will end with the two of you naked, sticky and sweaty. "When you live apart, you make time for sex – any minute you can get your hands on each other, you do," says Logan Levkoff, a sexologist and advice columnist. "But when you're around one another all the time, the frequency of sexual activity may taper off.

This means you'll need to accept the transition from hardware to software: less bonking, more spooning.

3. Gentlemen, start your dust busters
Divvying up domestic chores is one of the first things a co-habiting couple needs to discuss. Forget equality. "Everything doesn't have to be fifty-fifty," says Dr Andrew Cherlin, author of Marriage, Divorce, Remarriage. "If one of you works 50 hours a week and the other 25, there's nothing wrong with the less busy person taking on more of the housework."

Reduce the tension and tedium by volunteering for housework that doesn't drive you crazy. My buddy Josh hates washing cutlery, but he doesn't mind scrubbing pots and pans. So he tackles the heavy metal while his wife merrily tends to the flatware.

4. Love is annoying
It's inevitable: now that you're living together, you're gradually going to discover each other's irritating habits.

Wynne Whitman, co-author of Shacking Up, prefers a gentler constructive approach. "Instead of shouting, 'Why the hell do you always leave your handbag on the floor?' try saying, 'It makes me very happy when you put your handbag away.' This phrasing makes your roomie think she's doing you a favour and it doesn't seem like a chore."

5. You're not engaged – yet
There is a subtext to this move. According to the Annual Review of Sociology, about 75% of co-habiting couples say they plan to marry their partners. Additionally, 55% of marriages today are preceded by co-habitation. But not every couple who live together are destined to walk down the aisle together.

Like it or not, when you move in with your girlfriend, you're sending a message: "I'm ready to settle down." Unless you've made it clear that living together is not a formal engagement, she's likely to think there's a diamond ring in her immediate future.

6. Live and learn – together
You may discover, as I did, that your girlfriend's good qualities more than make up for her uselessness as a mover. Or you may find that her insistence on replacing the toilet-paper roll so it feeds from the bottom is too much for you to take. Either way, you're in this together. Find a way to get over, through, or around every obstacle and your relationship may evolve into something even more wonderful than convenient sex.

"There's a misconception that people who co-habit never want to get married," says Whitman. "I disagree. I think, on the contrary, they want to make sure they have only one marriage. They want to make sure this is the right person before they commit."

And before they have to lug all those boxes back down 13 flights of stairs.

Do you live with your partner? Share your experiences with us below.