No, actually, I’m not too sensitive!

Have you ever been told you're too sensitive? Maybe you're an HSP - a "highly sensitive person", but that may not be such a bad thing.

There’s actually an abbreviation for sensitive people: HSP!

Why do so many of us think that being “sensitive” means you are a whiner or you just a baby when it comes to emotions and feeling?

Many of us grew up thinking sensitive = weak. People who are sensitive need to suck it up and get a thicker skin - at least that’s what many people say.
 
What if you're just a step ahead than the rest of the pack and are more able to detect changes, hidden signals or things which influence you a person? 
 
It doesn’t matter if you are introverted, extroverted or somewhere in between; your sensitivity is your foundation.
 
I am a sensitive person. Sometimes I'm too trusting and gullible, but I know from experience that I should be a bit wary about people and situations. Maybe it’s my sculpted inner self that warns me against certain things in life. 

I pick up on people’s feelings, emotions, and energies very quickly. I absorb them. I feel them internally.

And so my reactions to people can be strong. Strong but patient; sometimes too patient, sometimes not patient enough. Sometimes I am too tolerant as well, to my own detriment, and I have learnt harsh lessons as a result.
 
We have a limited amount of space in our lives. We need to ensure that we leave space or fill our space with people who truly lift you up on every level.  

I feel terrible about judging a person because someone else might have let me down, and this can be confusing. As much as I would like to intuitively open up, to be able to feel and share, I realise that the world still has some dark areas and it get harsher. 

Hard lessons have been learnt in life with negative people. When you are feeling all-over-the-place emotional you definitely don't want to feel threatened by the people closest to you.

Don't invest in negative people who are full of pretense and wear masks.   
 
So when you are pondering into your deep self, or if you are in a vulnerable state, there is no fear of being taken advantage off. 

Choose people wisely. Unfortunately we learn, sometimes very late in life, that we need to choose carefully who we allow into our life; who gets close to our tender and fragile heart.

If you allow the wrong people into your private space, they will be close enough to stab your hear and enjoy watching it cry tears of blood.

Make sure that the people you allow into your personal close area have your best interest at heart.

I was indiscriminate before. I have an extremely high tolerance for annoying and selfish personalities.

I spent years just keeping my mouth shut and subjecting myself to any personality that came my way and wanted to be in my space. I am still learning the self-honouring practices of who to keep and who to let go.
 
Boundaries are important. People tell you, stop being a hardass. Lower your walls.

We all have boundaries; which helps us effectively repel unwelcome forces. We only realise how important these boundaries are after we have been breached.

Many might disagree with this. However, boundaries are like personal space, and we hate the guy in the queue breathing down your neck, because he is invading your ‘personal space’. Similarly your feelings, emotions and your well-being need protection as well, hence boundaries, so that no-one runs riot within yourself.
 
Reinforce your defences like a no fly zone! Bulletproof yourself - We tend to be more armoured because we realise that people will let you down. They will throw you to the wolves to save themselves, and while they might say they would take a bullet for you, you might soon realise they're the one holding the gun.

We have to learn to bulletproof ourselves in order for us to survive in this world.
 
Treasure the lessons Your past has taught you. However, understand and accept that your past wasn’t always in your control. You were subject to the opinions, agendas, and preconceived notions of those around you.

People weren’t taught to nourish sensitivity. They were taught to “toughen up”, “grow a backbone”, “be like everyone else”, “fit in”, etc.
 
A lot of those lessons were simply just WRONG.

And so we spent much of our lives fighting against our very natures. The very thing we should have been nourishing, we were condemning.

And so we swam upstream and learned to resent the tide.

The tide was going in the right direction all along, you just needed to learn to swim with it not against it.

Now that you know that, accept your past, learn from it and build a bridge and get over it. It’s definitely not a mirror of your future, it just teaches you to swim with the tide and not against it.
 
Your inner self and your sensitive nature is your guide in uncharted territories. It’s your subtle sidekick. You can either carry it with you and accept it OR deny it and let it derail you. 

Check out Saffiya's blog and follow her on Twitter.

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Read more on: inspiration  |  advice

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