A pair of African American guys are suing The Bachelor? I couldn't believe it either. But it's true. This is ground-breaking stuff! So why stop there?
Let's go wild and hand out "racial summons" to every show we can think of. Here are the ones that I would take to court – if I had the time, money and energy. (Please note this is all my own opinion and I swear my editor didn't force me to put that statement in there.)
Let's kick off with Sex and the City.
Yes, I realise the show ended almost a decade ago, but I'm pretty sure reruns are airing somewhere in the world. As long as it's still showing on some random series channel, why not point out the lack of women of colour in the series. ("Hey! I'm black and I have a sex life too dammit!")
Okay, so Jennifer Hudson had a role in one of the films – but why didn't she have a sex scene? Come on! It's not fair. And what about an Indian woman? Or a coloured one? Or a Puerto Rican one? It's only fair, right?
I loved this series too. It was filled with all sorts of fabulousness – especially Phoebe and her special rendition of "Smelly Cat". But surely between the six (six!) of them they could find at least one comrade of colour, man.
How I Met Your Mother
I'm not-so-secretly hoping the mother is of another race. But it might take another 400 episodes before we find out.
Two and a Half Men
You mean to tell me Charlie didn't even have a smidgeon of had jungle fever? Just once? Just once, Charlie?! I'm taking it personally.
Oh, wait… Jake Harper does have a crush on that cute girl of colour next door, Celeste. Okay. I won't file the papers – provided he grows up and marries her in the next 7 series.
I have no real evidence to back this up, but I just have a feeling that all the characters are white. I might be taking it a tad too far, but you've been served SquarePants! I'm on a roll here, folks.
Girls of the Playboy Mansion
Hugh, buddy, we need to have a little talk.
Let's ALL sue!
Generations… of blacks
I remember a few years ago there was a white woman on Generations – she even spoke Zulu at one point. I was mightily impressed by her. I don't know if she's still there (because honestly, I haven't watched for the past three years or so). But I doubt it. Still, that should be enough reason to sue, right?
Obviously, I can't do it myself since I'm a black woman, but we're a rainbow nation. So why not spice up the colour barometer on one of SA's largest soapies? And, no, I'm not hinting to people of other races. I'm just saying…
Were there any Indian people in The Boondocks? I can't remember. But I think someone should look into it.
Every dance reality TV show there is…
Because, black people have tight moves, y'all. And this shit ain't fair. Let's do a swimming reality TV show and see how that goes…
Okay, I can't think of anymore. So pop your suggestions into the box below and let's get started serving court papers, y'all!
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