Scent of a (famous) woman
Lili Radloff debates whether or not celebrities should endorse products.
Last night a friend of mine brought my attention to Avril Lavigne’s new fragrance, Black Star. Now this is not the first time Avril has provoked my ire.
When former Miss Baggy Pants turned all slutty and disappointed a whole generation of girls who thought that maybe, just maybe, you didn’t have to wear pink and shake what your mama gave you to make it as a woman in the music industry, I was miffed enough to write a column about it.
Okay, I know what you’re wondering. You’re wondering why I'm wasting my time writing - again - about a manufactured Canadian teeny bopper who might or might not be human (I mean, have you seen how many teeth she has?).
The answer is that I'm not so much interested in her this time as the whole phenomenon of 'celebrity endorsement'. After all, it is kind of strange, once you think about it.
I tell you now, sure as pants, that there are gazillions of people who will buy an Avril Lavigne 'inspired' perfume, with the same enthusiasm they will buy Victoria Beckham’s underwear range – as if Posh can even remember what it feels like to wear a bra – and Miley Cyrus toothpaste or Giselle Bundchen's shoes… Hang on, I’m actually wearing a pair, but only because someone gave them to me, okay?
It’s the final celebrity sell out: lend your name to something that you don’t know anything about and that has only the flimsiest link to whatever it is you do. (Okay, Miley Cyrus does have very white teeth and I admit, Giselle might know a thing or two about fashion, but you get my basic drift.) You can call it cashing in or you can call it selling out, the point is, Celeb X ends up with a lot less street cred and a lot more money.
Then again, that seems to be the only thing most people hope to achieve in this life; so I’m not judging. Ag fine, I am. But that’s only because I’m all about the street cred.
Of course this phenomenon isn't only limited to The Overseas. For heaven’s sake, even Kobus Wiese has his own fashion range! “If it will fit Kobus it will fit you.” And remember those awful pleated chinos Jonty Rhodes advertised for more, erm, crotch space?
And Patricia Lewis has long since helped women who were worried that their wigs might look too natural by advertising Flashpoint extensions along with that Mandy chick from Big Brother.
I suspect that locally the whole phenomenon is about to get much worse. Apparently, a while ago, DJ Fresh used to make up fantasy perfumes for local celebs. It’s not so far-fetched. I can just see Khanyi Dhlomo, for example, bringing out her own fragrance (I’m thinking… Black Diamond). And Joost can have a very own masculine eau de cologne called Colombia. And shouldn’t Kurt Darren open a haberdashery called Loslappie? The possibilities, heaven help us, seem to be endless.
Now imagine if the politicians cottoned on to this. Helen Zille could endorse botox, the kind that kept your face fixed in a constant look of indignant disapproval. Lindiwe Sisulu should endorse her own range of kickass shoes and we can call them Boots made for walking (all over soldiers). And Malema can publish an English/Pedi dictionary – although he’d probably need a ghostwriter. And Thabo Mbeki’s fragrance? What about Obscure?
Actually, the more I think about it, the more I think politicians should endorse products. Especially if it means that they will use that money to pay for their own damn cars.
Do you agree with Lili? Let us know what you think about celebrities endorsing products in the box below...