Bad boys. Yum.
Sex guru Dorothy Black tells us why bad boys make her slither off her chair.
I think I have a new crush. I went to watch a Taxi Violence gig last week and nearly slid off my seat watching the lead singer George vd Spuy roaring into the mike – all forceful noise, tight jeans and sweat. And tattoos. Yum.
It's a fact that rock musos have that whole animalistic sex appeal thing about them that just makes you want to throw your panties on stage. But I think that appeal can be boiled down to a character type. The bad boy.
A good kinda bad boy has that unapologetic sense of self that makes a girl weak at the knees. He knows what he wants and he knows how to get it. If he wants you, he won't be playing kindergarten games to let you know about it. He's rough around the edges without being abrasive. There's a rawness about him that's immediately arresting.
A good kinda bad boy oozes sex through his un-Hugo Bossed pores.
He is the polar opposite of the metrosexual. And there's the rub. A good kinda bad boy can be attractive, rugged even, but he's never, ever pretty.
To be fair, I have a fundamental aversion to men that are too pretty and too groomed. Metrosexuals frighten me. They actually do. You won't find white pointy shoes, tailored shirts, a full wax and a pedicure on my checklist of what makes a man sexually appealing.
And I know I'm not alone in this – Madonna had Sean Penn, Kate had Pete Doherty, Vanessa has Johnny Depp, Nicole has Joel Madden ... even Steve Hofmeyr made his break with the bad boy image, and let's face it, he's no oil painting.
I suppose I'm just down-right uncomfortable with the whole sissyfication of the male image. I hate it when men wax all their pubes and fuss about fragrance. I've never been attracted to pre-pubescent boys and if I wanted to go out with a girl, I would.
Now I know some of you (men most likely) will be coming up with some lame stereotypical reasons for why women go for bad boys, like: 'just to prove they can tame them'. But I'll stop you before you go there and tell you straight up why women are really attracted to bad boys.
Because, generally speaking, they're a better lay than the metros.
Now I wasn't going to over-simplify this, but let's.
Point. If I had to choose a night with bad boy George or metro Janez, I'd go with George. Partly because I find Janez' sexual orientation dubious but mostly because, hot body and all, he'd probably be too busy watching himself.
You know the type.
If you've ever had the pleasure of sleeping with a Class A metro, you'll know that you are nothing more than a prop in the stage show that is their body in the act of sex.
Their appreciation of the vagina is only as a receptacle of their penis and any time they spend 'down there' without Mr Big is merely perfunctory. They usually shower afterwards.
I guess it really comes down to that piece of advice some mothers are wise enough to hand down to their daughters: Never to go out with the man that thinks he's prettier than you. Its an oldie but a goodie. Keep it in mind the next time you evaluate your next kill.
As for me, I've found myself suddenly more interested in live rock gigs these days. Now I just need to find out when Taxi are playing again...
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What do you think about Dorothy's taste in men? Feel the same? What's your take on the 'perfect' partner? Pop your theory in the box below.
- Women24