Mrs_Miller
Need some relationship advice! Ask our resident Agony Aunt, the lovely Mrs Miller. Read more
Recent Questions
QUESTION
I do not have a problem with my libido....because i have no libido. no desire to have sex at all, i dont even get horny. My homeopath took me off the pill because it caused some problems, but even that didnt help get my sex drive back. I have a friend (female) that is on depo Testosterone and she says it works.... i am willing to try anything. Just worried about the side effects. What do i do? hormone replacement? help me....
ANSWER
Dear Sylvia,
Unfortunately you don't mention age or medical history in your letter. Is your lack of libido a recent development? Do you achieve orgasms through sex or masturbation? Are you in a sexual relationship? Do you suffer from depression?
There are many facets to lack of libido - both external (medication and lack of stimuli) and internal (physical and mental).
Start by visiting your GP to ascertain that you are physically healthy.
Then you'll have to start exploring your body and your sexuality again. Find out what interests you. Find things that turn you on. Make yourself orgasm. Read, play, explore. You might need to see a psychologist in this phase.It can be a hard road but it is worth it in the end.
Lastly, this might sound strange but do you need a libido at the moment? If you don't miss sex at the moment, you might want to focus on other things in life. Sometimes when you stop pressurising yourself to feel what you think you should feel, things work themselves out.
Good luck.