Funnily enough, I offered to let someone in on the contents of my handbag.
In order to appreciate what an honour? (is it?) this was, you need to understand that I am a worrier. A “you never know when you may need this”, lil miss uber – prepared.
So, I delved into the depths of my floral (one-of-a-kind, handmade, because occasionally I am a bag snob) carry-all and proceeded to draw out the products of my “keep as much of what you could possibly need on you” stash.
Even I was surprised.
First, I pulled out the notebooks and pens, and kindly note the plural. There was the mini-moleskin and its fine-point friend, as I refuse to write with any other type. Then, there was a little flip-over journo-type one that also had its own pen. My notebooks may be a bit snobbish about things, too. Who knew?
Next, we were greeted with the final member of the notebook family – the A4. Purchased at my favourite store, Typo, it’s my security blanket of notebooks, with matching Typo pen.
I bet at this stage you’re wondering if I would mention bringing out my meds – no, I wouldn’t.
That's not all...
Out came the usuals, you know, wallet, tissues, wet wipes, hand sanitizer, chewing gum, strawberry supa-c’s, big lash volume mascara, receipts, lip gloss, more tissues, more strawberry supa-c’s, a highlighter, my cellphone charger (should probably take that out and charge my phone before bed), sunglasses, and so on.
Stilll not finished...
Elbow deep, I dug around inside my bag and pulled out the following:
- A Kalahari.com order confirmation (I want to own all my favourite series and movies on DVD)
- A 50% off voucher at Lashies (Mom may want that)
- A two-prong plug
- A torch (!!!)
- A fake leatherman (in it’s own pouch) because you never know when you may need a bottle opener, knife, mini screwdriver, or what looks suspiciously like an industrial tweezer, but isn’t.
- A nail – clipper
- Nail polish remover pads (my favourite brand, courtesy of my bestie who came back from London a couple weeks ago)
- My ID book that is filled with boarding passes and post-its reminding me to take my ID book to various meetings and/or appointments
- A tub of blueberries (left-over lunch)
- Enough change to tip every single car guard I meet for the next 6 months.
Now, I was wise enough to not reveal too much about the contents of the bag, that I have been carrying around to work, malls, clubs, and various other places for a good couple of weeks, to the person who had asked (I’m sure regrettably by the end of it) to see.
Am I waiting for an Apocalypse? The day Zombies decide to pull rank and screw us over as a species? The day someone may ask
“Anyone have a torch on them?” Because, pray tell me, what am I doing carrying all that shit around?!
Strange thing is – my bag is still pretty full despite coming to this realisation. In actual fact, I’m elbow deep in it once more and I may have just found the smaller bag I was going to use this week.
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