When I heard from my friends (who are obviously a bunch of leftwing terrorist hippies) that the owner/founder of the South Africa Sucks blog was arrested last week, I was rather keen to get the full story. Who wouldn’t be curious to learn more about the man who openly spews bile like a teenager drunk on Old Brown Sherry? And by the way, by “openly” I meant “anonymously”.
The so-called Uhuru Guru has been identified as a certain Bert Oosthuizen who lives in Joburg. (Apparently he is still in SA because he can’t get access to another country. Strangely, I’m not surprised.)
Now I think it’s fair to say that Bert doesn’t like South Africa, the government and black people in general. And he also doesn’t like me much.
To which I can only say, take a number and stand in line, buddy.
The baser part of me thinks people like Oosthuizen should be locked in jail. And yet, being a believer in a free society I was rather alarmed at the thought that the police can apparently just barge into your house, confiscate your happy-making interweb shit and throw your ass in the chookie.
Sometimes I really curse the fact that I believe in freedom of speech. Because God knows, not everyone deserves a voice.
Thankfully, there seems to be a story behind the story, so I won’t be losing any sleep about us living in a police state if I were you. (The details, at this point, is still sub judice, but I’ll keep you updated.)
What struck me about this sad little case is that although there are many crazy-ass white supremacist blogs wildly abuzz with the news, I was unable to find many official news reports on the actual event. That’s because we, the media are in cahoots with the police and the government and we’re busy plotting secretly against Oosthuizen. (BWHAHAHA!)*
Radio 702 was one of the few mainstream radio stations to cover this issue. They interviewed Bert, some dodgy old guy who busted him, Dan Roodt (who was mercifully quiet, praise be to the gods) and Nic Haralambous, one of the creators of sarocks.co.za and the only sane person on the panel. On air Bert reckoned that his site is justified because so many people support it. Nic (when he finally got a chance to speak) pointed out that child pornography is also huge on the internet. Well played Nic.
Bert’s looniness was really demonstrated when he said his problem with South Africa is that we don’t live in a colourblind society. This coming from the man who runs a blog from which the following statements are taken: (I’m not linking to this blog for obvious reasons, but if you would want to go and check it out because of some sort of morbid curiosity, make sure you have an empty stomach and a shower nearby.)
“In the black townships of South Africa, the Nigerians and Somalians are the experts in “Kroes hare”. Our blacks are too stupid to do their own hair.”
On yours truly: “I cannot wait until that white slut wakes up one night with a stinking simian raping her while her husband watches as she drowns in her own blood. Then she’ll start singing Die Stem.”
And so on.
Bert Oosthuizen says his site is not a hate site, but a satire site. I think someone should explain to him what satire means before he embarrasses himself any further.
I’m interested to see what will happen when Bert expects his next promotion in the very BEE IT industry. Now that’s the stuff of satire.
I’ve never really thought revenge is sweet, but I can’t help contemplating the confectionary aspects of just desserts and humble pie.
Eat up, Mr. Oosthuizen.
*I made that up. Still, BWHAHAHA!
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