Astro match: Jacob Zuma and Helen Zille

Imagine if two of SA’s most renowned politicians had to be a couple. Here’s what the stars would have to say.

Helen Zille was born March 9, 1951 in Johannesburg. She is a Pisces. Her Chinese sign is a Rabbit. According to our compatibility profile, it takes very little to keep your Piscean woman happy.

The Pisces woman enjoys being sent flowers on a monthly basis and two bunches on special occasions.  She is vulnerable, sensitive and easily hurt by others’ thoughtlessness, she does at times struggle to contain her emotions.

Jacob Zuma was born April 12, 1942 in Kwazulu Natal. He is an Aries and his Chinese sign is a horse. Our compatibility profile says that an Aries man quite fancies himself as the original Tarzan, fighting his way through the jungle. Stiff competition spurs him on and does not frighten him in the least.

He is blessed with abundant energy and stamina. He becomes frustrated and aggravated if he feels caged. He is also a naive romantic at heart and while his partner would be feminine, he also expects her to be self-sufficient.

Zuma has been married 6 times (one committed suicide and the another – home affairs minister Nkosazana Dlamini-Zuma – divorced him). Now he has four wives. Zille on the other hand is not a fan of sharing. She would probably send the other wives back home (would the word “refugees” apply here?).

Then again Zuma with his thoughtlessness would probably promise her the world and only deliver a province (if he does deliver of course), while singing his favourite lullaby to her: “Umshini wam umshini wam…”.

Being an Aries, Zuma likes his freedom and does not like to feel caged. So Zille being a woman who loves  a challenge, would probably get him a bigger shower so he’ll be comfortable.

Both politicians have abundant energy and passion, in and out of Parliament.

Zille has a very strong deep background of journalism (Debra Patta has nothing on her) but being such a serious career woman would leave little time for her to do the dishes. Could Zuma land up cleaning up after her?

*Disclaimer* This article is satirical.

Find out what Pisces are like in bed.
Find out what Aries are like in bed.

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Image courtesy of ZANews.

If Zuma and Zille would hook up, how compatible do you think they would be? Let us know in the box below.

- Women24

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